Total Badass Here.

Mhmm.... so much for blogging on the 26th. Oh well, I got a good excuse.
I got too drunk.
There we go.
Lately, I 've been drinking more, I should probably stop? Well maybe, maybe not?
I'm amazed that I didn't cry my eyes out that day but heck the vodka shots helped out alot.
Vodka + Trampolien = FUN!
Memo to Self: Don't have cousins around when this happens... too much infomation is let out in such a short time. Plus one peticular individual would like to make a toast at my "future wedding" and mention a few things...
Over my dead body. Seriously.

I guess I should mention that Christmas was pretty great (alot better than last year's but don't tell my mother). Got alot f things I've asked for. Actually got my Dad his own presents with my own money! =D It depresses me that last year he had to buy his own presents because I ran out of money...
Memo to Self: Learn from your mistakes and then pretend they've never happened.
Might put a little (big) inventory of the stuff I've receive that morning. I'm not doing it to throw down people's throats (is that the term?) opps. I meant not to rub in people's faces (if there is people that even read my blog?). I just like making lists and then remind myself who gave them to me so I can send them a thank-you card, which would probably be late. I'm horrible at sending things through the mail... Had a bad experiance last year and acouple people didn't get my gifts I've sent then =[
So I have adapted a new phobia, a phobia of sending mail during the holidays. Pathetic eh?

Got a shit load of songs stuck in my head.... an their not what you would call... "my usual cup of tea".
No. No. No. I DON'T WANT TO MEET YOU AT THE HOTEL ROOM!!!
Stupid song... *Sighs*.

Got to go before I get into trouble. BLKEH. <- (my new favourite word!) XD. By the way, I'm really, really, really looking forward to Sping and seeing a dear, dear friend of mine. *hearts*


So long and farewell?


PS. Here's one of my favourite songs at the moment. Also. I'm too lazy to check up on my grammar. Total badass here. XP

Merry Christmas My Dears!

Well with it being Christmas and all... alot of stuff obviously goes on.
I won't be blogging later today, might blog on the 26th in memory of my dear friend, but I would like to wish everyone a Merry Christmas MY DEARS! (or Happy Holidays or whatever you celebrate)!!!
*YAY!*
I want to say a special thanks to one special person.
Thank you Brayden, for being there for me even though you are far away.
Just knowing that "you're there" for me no matter what, helps me get through the day.
You are dear to me.
I miss you!!!
Also thank to everyone else who's been there for me aswell, I greatly appreciate it. :]

Oh! And my friend Queenie had her baby boy! Congrats Queenie and Harry!!!
Dominic will be added to my birthday card list. :]


So long and farewell? And to all a goodnight.

You Are Delsuional.

I laugh and cry at your own destruction.
Your love doesn't mean anything. You think you are in love with her and the others beforehand;
but in reality, you are the one who is in love with the thought of being in love.
It's all in your mind, your little fantasy land of yours.
You are delusional.
And it's your own god damn fault.

What's Going On With Davey Havok's Hair?

OKAY... Well things are starting to get better. *Yay!*
Had a fun time last night. Went to the JingleBellRockFest - with opening acts ->Jetsoverhead, Tegan and Sara, and with the headliner -> AFI.
It was amazing. GOT FLOORTICKETS ASWELL AND I DIDNT GET TRAMPLED ON!!! Tehe.
Went with Mandy and Riki cause Fish went her own way. Didnt really mind. Drinks are expensive there... a medium cost $3.50 -> eeeeehhhhhhhhhh!
Jetsoverhead were okay I guess... not really into them that much, but it was nice background music when socialzing with Mandy and Riki at their seats.
Tegan and Sara was quite pleasentful. =] Never saw them before but I quite enjoyed it. Tegan was hilarious when talking about her christmas experiance and Sara was mostly the quiet one. Why did I have a sudden erge to grope them? Hahahahaa.

Anyyywayysss. AFI were frekin FANTASTIC!!! =D
Always wanted to see them since I was 13. My heart almost stopped when Miss Murder came on. JIZZED IN MY PANTS MUCH? HAHAHAHAAA.
Love that song! XD It was actually my first ringtone on my first cellphone. Haha.
IT WAS MEANT TO BE!!!
Still wondering what was going on with Davey Havok's hair. I don't mind it but it confuzzled me... complaring it to when he last had his hair...

My original plan before the show started was to get my BlueBucks from Danicas, drop my longboard off, and chug the booze down before going in.
What actuualy happened is this, went by Danica's, discovered that her boyfriend finished of both of my BlueBucks (didnt mind too much - he's a pretty cool guy), got a shot of Fireball, left, went by Will's and drop stuff off and my one beer that i got from my own place, went to meet up with Riki and Mandy.
So practically I was sober throughout the whole show, but hey, I dont mind. I actually like keeping a steady head once in awhile. =]


So long and farewell?

Difficult.

It's funny how when I first started to blog that I would just whip something out of thin air and just blog my thoughts... but now, I prefer writing a draft of random thoughts of which is sloshed on every nook and cranny of the scrap piece of paper. The paper of which would have probably been my homework assignment that would have been due the next day.
Oh typical me.
It's actually quite difficult for me now, trying to type this without a draft outline of what I wanted to say.
Mhmm...
The thinking begins and will hopefully end before the sun rises.
This week has been... um... what is that friken word? Mhmm... having a difficult time picking a work from the Thesaurus online site... WELL ANYWAYS, LETS JUST SAY IT WAS DIFFICULT!
There, I said it!
DIFFICULT.

I swear I can't think straight.
Reading a book called "Someone Like You". Possibly the worst choice for me to be reading at this time of year.
I was afraid to start reading it, but I eventually did. So the question is... How did the first couple chapters worked out? Well it's an okay book, not the greatest... I know what the plot is about but yet I took a chance to read it, knowing that possibly I would probably get quite emotional.
For the most part, the I don't relate to the majority of the story but for one part I do.
And that is where I fall the hardest.
I started reading it a quarter before my English class ended and when my class ended and I went outside for a smoke... I eventually started to cry.
Thankfully my "friend" and my sister were there to give me some comfort... but ugh... I felt like rubbish.
I miss him so much... it's going to be the first anniverisary of his death in a week.
I'm scared.

Who Touched My Cup?!?

Well it depresses me to say that someone else has already asked Mr.Y if they could do their Bio project on the Pacific Lumpsucker... of which I WANTED TO DO MY PROJECT ON!!!! Grrr.... Oh well; it only took me 5 minutes to get over it.
Now I'm happy to say that I've found my new victim... hehehe.
Haha, nah, I won't do anything evil... well not yet anyways. I decided to go with the fatest and laziest creature in our Bio fishtank...

THE CALIFORNIA SEA CUCUMBER!!!

Dundudndun duuuuhhhhhhh!!!!
Well it's not that fat or lazy actually but compared to the shrimps (who are shrimpy versions of chimpmunks on acid) well... it's deffiently more laidback. Haha.
On the subject of science... well in a way; WHO TOUCHED MY CUP??!!?!?!!?
I have this styrofoam cup in my Bio class that I specifically reserved for MYSELF, I even wrote on the side -> "Sara's cup - do not touch or she will find out and then someone will have to pay".
And guess what?
Someone has dared to touch MY cup and wrote on the side saying so.
THE NERVE!!! Grrrr...I will find out who that person is... and will make them pay with their life.
I'm serious!

Appearently I am violent? :S


So long and farewell?

On One Last Note.

I feel like I'm losing everyone.

Where Will You Go?

You're too important for anyone

You play the role of all you want to be

But I, I know who you really are

You're the one who cries before the dawn

But where will you go

With no one left to save you from yourself

You can't escape, you can't escape

You think I can't see right through your eyes Scared to death to face reality

No one seems to hear your hidden cries

You're left to face yourself alone

But where will you go

With no one left to save you from yourself

You can't escape the truth

I realize you're afraid

But you can't abandon everyone

You can't escape, you don't want to escape

I am so sick of speaking words that no one understands Is it clear enough that you can live your whole life all alone I can hear you in a whisper, but you can't even hear me screaming Where will you go With no one left to save you from yourself

You can't escape the truth

I realize you're afraid

But you can't reject the whole world

You can't escape, you won't escape You can't escape, you don't want to escape.

Aiming towards myself... this is how I've been feeling lately...

To everyone, I'm sorry.

Okay... I think I need a hug now.

Not The Smartest Idea in The World.

Mhmm not the greatest start to the morning… almost threw Mandy’s new pipe at Danielle. Why? It’s because I thought there wasn’t anything in the newspaper wrapping… but there was, that awesome skull pipe from Mexico. Scared the shit out of me when I realized there was something in it. Thankfully I stopped myself before I destroyed it. Riki would have shitted her pants... for she was the one who bought it for Mandy in the first place.
On the topic of that awesome skull pipe, I’m what you can say…. GREEN WITH ENVY.
Why does Mandy get a pipe and all I get is a dinky sombrero that can only fit a mandarin orange head? Oh well… it came from Mexico so it’s still pretty chill.
I somehow managed to convince a guy in my Bio class to buy me a pipe when he goes to Mexico during the break… that reminds me… got to get $10 to him before he leaves…

Okay… maybe I shouldn’t have gone on the computer last night… what the fuck is wrong with me? And how do I remember my passwords while intoxicated?
Jeezewhiz.

This weekend was FANTASTICAL!!!
Seriously it was.
Went to my friend’s Christmas/birthday party on Friday night. What could I say?
Probably one of the best parties of the whole year! It’s funny how I didn’t drink that much and yet I still got pretty smashed. Oh wait; it was probably the pot that did me in.
Wow, I am such a smart person to mix alcohol with drugs. Oh well, I will eventually learn my lesson… hopefully before it’s too late.
Felt like such a badass drinking my own beer and socializing with smart artistic people. Tehe.
I enjoyed it.

On Saturday I went to my friend’s baby shower. It was pretty good, but I kind of ate too much for my own good. Also I suppose it didn’t help that I was drinking shitty beer (thank god it was only one can!). WAIT A SECOND… why do people serve beer at bay showers? O_o
Anyways it was nice to see that Queenie and Harry were doing well. Queenie is due on the 28th and her “peanut” child will be called Dominic James Riches Fritzpatrick.
This is the third child to be named Dominic or Dominick from my friends… The coincidence scares the hell out of me, but at least now I know what not to name my future baby boy (if I do ever have one). Anyways, I’ve spent some time with Mariz as well during the baby shower. We went for a walk ad ate ice cream sandwiches on the way (and in the winter too!). It was relaxing.

Sunday, we finally put up our Charlie Brown Christmas tree. Yes it is small and dinky, just barely taller than me. Haha. I love decorating the house around this time of the year… makes the atmosphere more “homely-like” if you get what I mean. =] Our poor Christmas tree is engulfed by presents… I feel bad for it. Poor little tree is getting overwhelmed. Haha.
Chilled with a friend later that night (yesterday, last night), drank a pack of Kokanee beer by the Harbor. Would have been nicer if it was warmer out… drinking cold beers outside in the cold… not the smartest idea in the world.

Why the hell did I post that lastnight?
Eeeeeeeeehhhhhh.


So long and farewell?

Here's Some More Kinky.

God I'm Drunk.

God I'm drunk. hahhahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahhahaha
Needed to get that out of my system.
Haha.
Mhmmm.... So I understand that you want to kiss me but why? SERIOUSLY WHY???
People says it's because I'm pretty, cute, adorable, hot, etc.. (BLEH!)
But honeslt.y... those don't seem to be like real answers... maybe it's becuase I'm drunk at the moment it doesn't seem so... BUT HONESTLY WHY WOULD SOMEONE WANT TO KISS ME?

Feedback?

Mhmmm... might regret posting this in the morning but what ever.
Tehe
Had a fun night! *Yay!* XD

Zombies Are Expensive.

Goddamnit!
ZOMBIES ARE BLOODY EXPENSIVE!!!
Jesus Christ.

Went Christmas shopping the other day for my cousins, did pretty well for the stuff I got them, I do hope they like it, but... KARL BETTER APPRECIATE THE AWSOME EXPENSIVE ZOMBIE SURVIVAL T-SHIRT I GOT HIM!!!
Yeah it's a zombie t-shirt and it's pretty goddamn awesome.
I went by Utopia and saw that they were having a sale ($5-$10), it made me excited. Haha. So I went on a mission to get the perfect t-shirt that even my picky cousin can't refuse!
I went through so many frekin t-shirts that I was starting to get frustrated, then I saw it.
The Zombie Survival t-shirt. It was beautiful.
When I went to pay for it, I found out that it didn't cost $10 or $15 but $25!
FUCK, oh well I did buy it anways, but I was worried that I wouldn't have enough to pay for it... had $50 in my account and spent half of that already...
Amazingly enough I did, but it was close, 7 cents close...

I do want to mention that the gusy that work at Utopia are pretty chill but their sale signs decieved me.
Won't be going by there anytime soon unless somebody gives me the money for me to buy myself a Betty Page cigerette case ( *hint* pssst! it's only $25! *hint* ).

Oh and I forgot to mention earlyier that I'm going to Danica's birthday party tonight! It's going to be frekin AWESOME!!! It's funny how she used to babysit me when we used to live in Smithers in the 90's, moved around abit and then ended up in the same city. She's fantastic! =D

Kinda nervous about after school... but oh well. =]


So long and farewell?

Appear "Obsessed" or "Infatuated".

Mhmmm... maybe I am starting to lose my touch at blogging..
More and more thoughts are swiriling in my head in an unorderly way.
Desicions to make, more shopping to finish, and trying not to lose my marbles. And all in less than one week.
Screwed much?
It's getting colder out lately which is nice for a change. I always have loved the cold even when I do complain about it. In a way that does make me a hypocrite, but what has possibly prompt me to complain in the first place was probably the wind.
I love the cold but I hate it when it does get windy out. I hate the wind as much as I hate auto-flusing toilets.
Luckly for me the wind has finally stopped and now the weather is almost perfect. All we hope now is it to snow.
My dear friend Mandy and I were planning on having another Coffin Grinder photoshoot (WINTER COLLECTION!) when it does snow. Mandy is being impatient though, she wanted to do it last week but I convinced her to wait and get the perfect winter setting we would need to make the photoshoot perfect.

Others news, my "friend" has left us for a week to go take wedding pictures in the States.... *Sighs*.
It's boring when he's not here. No doubt he is deffiently going to have some "fun" in LasVagas or any other place he does go. I hate the saying "What happens in Las Vagas, stays in Las Vagas."... kinda worries me. Bleh.
Well as long as he is happy, I'm happy. =]

I guess compared to others, I seem more reserved or lacking in affection (?) to others, but you know what? I'm used to keeping it to myself and then finding a personal setting to express those feelings to a person etc. but personally I do wish I was more open about with letting others know my affection for one or others. The word that would probably help explain my situation is shyness. I'm too shy to leave a message saying "I miss you so much, come back to me please!!!! *hearts* *hearts* *hearts* *hearts* *hearts*.
I'm afraid that if I do something like that, that it would make me appear "obsessed" or "infatuated" and that the person I've sent that to, would reject me.

Anyways... I've started reading Lady Oracle by Magaret Atwood. It seems promising.
Oh, I just remembered, my friend, Danica, went out to see her when she was here last week, and Danica got her to sign her chest! And right in front of her parnter! Hahahaha. She is such a lucky duck. I wished that I went.


So long and farewell?

You Guys Are My Favourite. <3

Well... okay where do I start?
Alot of stuff happened since Friday... and it seems that I might be moving to London, England in July.
Why?
Well my dad is in the military and is trying to get posted there.
He first mentions it on Friday morning and tells me that I have to decide wether or not he should try to apply for it before Monday.
That stressed the hell out of me.
I mean going to England for two years would be fucking awesome and I would get to do so many fucking things. IT WOULD BE AMAZING.
And yet... I would have to leave my "home" and friends behind.
My friends are so fucking important to me that it made me cry hearing about it that Friday morning, luckly I didn't have my make-up on...
I mentioned it to a group of my friends during lunch, but I assumed by none of them saying anything I thought they didn't hear me... I guess I was wrong.
I actually forgotten all about it after lunch but I was reminded of it that day when my dad came home. Alex (my super ninja ex boyfriend) was there with me playing Call of Duty 4, so he heard everything when my dad brought it up...
I'm not good at making discions in general, it made me felt so lost. I wanted to cry my eyes out right then but I held them back... Thank god Alex was there though... (Alex if you reading this, thanks for the support)... I really appreciated it.

My dad wouldn't stop talking about the trips to Paris we could take, the private school I could be going to, and the all year long icerinks I could skate.... I knew he was bribing me... you could see it in his eyes that he really wanted to go.
I told him on Saturday morning that I would be fine with it.
Even though I told him my desciine, it felt like I should've taken me time to think about it but... I dont know... I'm lost... I think I just need a hug.
Also it sucked that I couldn't see my friend Friday night, I WAS LOOKING FORWARD TO IT, LIKE REALLY REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO IT. It's been a rough week and I needed some relaxing time with him.
He is dear to my heart.

Luckly I did get a chance to see him when I got icecream today with Jesse. Simon almost made me choke on the mini tasting spoon. Jeeze... I almost died laughing with a spoon in my mouth.
Would have loved to stay longer and chat but I was seeing Jesse who I haven't seen since VEMF, when he totally ditch me for caps and girls that wanted to get down his pants. Jeeze... Haha.
IT'S SO FREKIN COLD OUTSIDE!!! POOR JESSE DIDN'T EVEN HAD SOCKS ON!
FUCK, I hope he doesn't freeze to death walking to the bus stop. I will feel so bad about it.
Earlier we took acouple funny pictures on my webcam -> It was fun.


To Simon, Brayden, Alex, Jesse, and Matt...
YOU GUYS ARE MY FAVOURITE! <3


So long and farewell?

Lumpy The Lumpsucker.

Okay, so there's this huge fish tank in my Biology class and it's filled up with a bunch of marine organisms including kelp. There once was this dinky fish that caught my eye acouple months ago and his name was Lumpy. Lumpy was a Pacific Spiney Lumpsucker. What is that you may say? WELL it's a fish that's the size and the shape of a small golfball with a suction cup underneath itself. He swims around and then when he gets tired he suddenly starts to suck the side of the glass and rests. Lumpy's original colour is exactly the same shade as Orange Crush, but he was then turning gray... not exactly.. a healthy colour for him. Didn't match his eyes at all. Usually when fish do change their colours... it means that they are very sick or potentially close to death. I told Mr.Y that Lumpy is going to die but he said that he was just sick and that he would get better. A week later, Lumpy went missing.

He's dead and now is residing in Mr.Y's fridge. Told you so. Anways, I guess all I can say now is that... Lumpy, we miss you and we'll never forget you, you silly sucker.

So long and farewell?

Lumpy the Lumpsucker

October 2008 - October 2009

RIP

It Makes Me Sad When You're Sad.

Well the past couple days has been fucked, so I was hoping that today would be different...
Well its not as bad as the other days, but this still hurts just as much.
It makes me sad when you're sad. I can tell when your lying especially when you say that you're fine, cause you're not.
I hate it. I feel hopeless in this situation.
I just want to see you smile and see that your eyes are gleaming with happiness...
But until then, please remember that I'm there for you and that you can confide in me.
*Hugs*
I'll be there for you.