Shrivled Up Worrywart.

Crap. Well I decided to "attempt" to quickly make a "quick" blog during my English 12 or... is it Communications 12 class? Anyways I don't have any time later today when I do get off from school beacuse I got to clean the whole frekin house from top to bottom.
It's extremely intenese and needs ALL my attention focused on it if I do want my house cleaned for my dad's upcoming birthday. I swear to god this is going to make me shit my pants (hopefully not literally ofcorse).
I miss Brayden so much, especially for the fact that he is currently chilling out in Alberta and I have no contact with him. And this turns me into a shrivled up worrywart.

Oh joy.

So I got the get my house house cleaned by tomorrow and I have to go to EVERY single class EVERY single day for the next two weeks if I am going to be on my dad's good side.
Bloody fuck, I'm so honestly lazy, its pathetic.
AND I got to get all the bloody homework I am missing in by Thursday.
Yes, as you can tell by now, I am crap at organizing a timetable and myself to get my life sorted out. Fun eh?
Yesterday I finally got all my photos developed and paid for (extrememly in debt now) and got them posted on facebook. But here are acouple for kicks (ILOVEYOUJENNI!). Enjoy and I might post some dirty kinky pictures on later this week.
It is depressing that I used to have made it a tradition for myself to post kinky pictures but haven't done so in ages.
Oh well..


So long and farewell?

Expect It Now.

What can i say? There's alot of emotions swiriling in my head.
It just makes me depressed just even trying to sort it out.
Happy, sad, frustrated, annoyed, and anger.
Bleh.
I'm tired of getting dirty looks from Brenden and Manny (but then again I do expect it from Manny, it is his nature to do so). Their prominent gaze sends me into complete panic mode.
Twitching, itching, just wanting to scream "WHAT DID I DO WRONG?!?!"
Brenden's glare came about when I started dating his friend over a year ago.
It made me feel like I didn't deserve to be there and that I would never fit in.
Now... even after my ex and I broke up, I still recieve them.
A worthless pathetic spec of dirt.
That's how I see myself in their eyes.
Why is it so?
Silence.
How the hell am I going to make it through without losing it. Confrontation?
If only I had the "balls" to do so.


Girls, girls, and more girls; was my sister's reply to a desperate question of mine.
It wasn't the answer I was looking for.
It didn't seem to be the truth.
He wants to drop the harlot rep and told me so, but I still needed to be reassured. I asked my sister if there was still others.
All was said... "He has girls.".
Wow... I feel special, yet it sadly doesn't surprise me.
I just wish it wasn't so.

My random blogging of random stuff should be expected of me... well only from those who know me personally, but to others who don't:
Expect It Now.


So long and farewell?